I stuck my finger up a woodpeckers hole , and the woodpecker said God Bless my soul ...( a perverted poacher )

Now I am here to strongly suggest that
you avoid any sexual contact with animals..
it is in fact illegal. Although if you cant help
yourself the best animal to have illicit sex with
has got to be a giraffe...at least she can warn you
if the police are coming. My favourite animal sex
joke is:
" Why did the pervert cross the road ? "
" Cos he couldnt get his cock out of the chicken ! "
I am only bringing up this subject because I am a taffy,
and all the valley boys have to put up with a barrage
of jokes about Welshman and sheep, when we move to this
godforsaken country. It is very irritating and tiresome.
Im more of a pig man myself but only if there is lashings
of apple sauce and the right vegetables.
But why bring this rather sordid subject up in the first
place I hear you asking ? Well I am fed up of these racial
stereotypes especially when I am the victim, and I am
fiercely campaigning against a law that is still on the
statute books. Apparently on a certain Sunday you can
still shoot a Welshman in Herefordshire . This cant be
right ! I was also appalled on my little jaunt to Cornwall
last year that the Cornish people arent that keen on the
Welsh. Something about the taffies coming over to work
the tin mines during the depression. I mean lets all try
to think about what Wales has bought you ...Harry
Secombe, Dylan Thomas, Shirley Bassey, Paul
Whitehouse, and Amen Corner. Not a piss head or sheep
shagger amongst them. Come on mates ....muckers...
lets give the sweaties and paddies some stick.....
marvellous.....