So I got that going for me anyway...( Caddieshack 1).

When I arrive at the pearly gates with my letters
of introduction , and a scrappy guiness stained Cv,
I will emphasise that I have caddied for Jesus or
the man who portrayed him on earth - Robert
Powell. Im sure this will rub out any minor blemishes
that may have accidently occurred on my bumpy
journey. He was also married to one of Pans People
( think on ! ) .
He had all the right gear but his practice swing
indicated that he may have no idea. It was a lovely
summers day and I was happy to be working unaware
of what was about to happen. I wished him luck and
handed him his driver. We were on the Old course
which is a much easier walk than the new , and I was
looking forward to testing him with some tricky
philosophical questions that had been worrying me for
some time.
He took an almighty lash at the ball and the ball
went flying into the woods right , hitting one of the pines
and balloning upwards , back towards the fairway. Before
it had landed a freak gust of wind propelled it further
down the fairway and as it was coming in to land a
kestrel swooped down and grabbed it flying first class
towards the green . As it flew over the green the bird
seemed to have some sort of seizure , releasing the ball
and the ball dropped in the hole . Hole in one.
We all stood open mouthed at this incredible
sequence of events . His opponent rather wittily said...
" So I got this for the half ....! " We all chuckled nervously.
As we all approached the green 10 minutes later the clouds
parted and a big booming voice said
" Leave it out son....its only a bleeding game ....! "
Hes not a great tipper but its not often you feel so close
to nature. A memorable day.