Reasons to be Grumpy ....Part 3

A slight adaptation of a great Ian Dury classic. Of course
if you have watched " Grumpy old Men " on the box you
will know that a special edition is made every Xmas. And
a good job too....as it made me realise that I was not alone.
As I am obliged to show interest and enthusiasm ..and a
certain bonhomie as part of the caddie package.....my theory
is that any kind of enforced goodwill without being paid for it
......sucks. This is why so many bars wont allow caddies in....
our idea of relaxation is to be as rude as possible.....and if you
dont accept that theory ....well then feck right off you shit for
brains.
There is also a type of manic madness.....which I despise.
You go to spend time with your in-laws.....whose political
beliefs defy logic....you find yourself listening to views that you
thought had died in the bunker with Hitler. You find yourself
listening to anals who did not know how to party when it was
1999.......and 7 long years on .....well. I hate it and when Boxing day
arrives ...thats when I want to celebrate. I am such a grump at
this time of year that even the memsahib just throws the food into
my pit. Thank God its a quiet one this year where I can growl just
at the missus .
I shall be sending my usual cards.....soon ....to get it over with.
She made the mistake of asking me the other night whether I wanted
to see the Xmas lights switched on......premature alzeimers obviously.
I declined and told her that while she was out there to talk to as many
strange men as possible. She failed to see the black humour.....black...
black....
I like the silly hats though ......is that dandyish....is it now....well
see about that.....
and you